Tonight I feel restless and yet more tired than I have been in a long time, I worry I am becoming depressed. I feel like I should be comfortable with my surroundings but my anticipation has been met with mediocrity. Three doors before me two are the same one is different. I feel I have laid before them in another life time. Towering over me. I have created a sanctuary in a shell here but it still doesn't change the fact I am trapped in my own making. I feel everything right now, excitement, overwhelmed, depression, loneliness, and most of all drifting. I reach out to touch something but there is nothing there, I am yet again not allowing myself to get close enough.